Embarrasing and frustrating morning...

Today did not go as I envisioned in my head...that's usually the spot where all the trouble starts to begin with, isn't it??? If you never had a preconceived notion of how things are supposed to go then you're not dissappointed when they go opposite, right?

First, we took a much needed and very enjoyable break last week from school. Not once did we open any books. The boys enjoyed it, I enjoyed it, but we all decided last night that we were eager to get back to schoolwork and the routine of our normal day. I was ready for us to resume our normal schedule and everything to fall back into place with ease. Well, the GE repairman decided to show up right when I normally start doing school. Okay...we're flexible...we'll just do school down stairs on the bar. Kids thought it great idea so off we go. Well...one distraction after another and I find myself repeating things over and over and getting frustrated from their lack of focus. At this point I should have had us run around the house to wake us up and get all of our wiggle worms out of our bodies...but I didn't. Instead I found myself getting hotter and hotter with aggrevation. I kept my cool though. GE man finally leaves (without fixing the problem since a whole new part has to be ordered...) and we go upstairs to continue with school. AFter a series of a few more events we sit down to do our math seatwork.

My biggest pet peeve is that when I'm "teaching" or talking with one boy, the other boy has to wait to ask me any question or not interrupt until I'm done. Well...that didn't happen. I was working with Ashton on something and Ethan interrupts me and I lose it...completely yell at him about interrupting me.

The worst part of it...the entire conversation was caught on my friend's cell phone voicemail!!! Apparantly my cellphone must have called hers accidentally and recorded this entire debaucle...how completely embarrassing.

I try hard to not be a "yeller"...nothings worse than Mommy yelling. Great memory maker too, right? Unfortunately I'm not perfect, this does sometimes happen. But this was definitely an exercise I will always keep in the back of my mind....

We should always speak to our spouses and children like someone is listening. Put our best foot forward not only in front of other's but more importantly behind closed doors. These are the people we love the most, yet are also the ones that get the brunt of our burdens and frustrations. My children are the most precious thing to me and I always want to choose my words, and the tone in which I speak them, in a matter that will be remembered as loving, not angry or hurtful.

So, I made my apologies to Ethan and I humbly now eat my crow, thankful not only for a Savior that forgives me when I act like a fool but children who forgive me also.