For the past two months I have been feeling led to change our math curriculums.  In the midst of this I somehow lost sight of who is REALLY in control over my children's education and have been on this crazy rampage over which curriculum out there is the ultimate best for my kids (which by the way does not exist...every one has it's own faults). I've been completely trying to take control of this and not resting in the promise God gives us.

In this morning's devotional this is what I read:

Rest in the stillness of My presence while I prepare you for this day.  Let the radiance of My glory shine upon you, as you wait on Me in confident trust.  Be still and know that I am God.  There is both a passive and an active side to trusting Me.  As you rest in My Presence, focusing on Me, I quietly build bonds of trust between us.  When you respond to the circumstances of your life with affirmations of trust, you actively participate in this process.  I am always with you, so you have no reason to be afraid.  Your fear often manifests itself in excessive planning.  your mind is so accustomed to this pattern of thinking that you are only now becoming aware of how pervasive it is and how much it hinders your intimacy with Me.  Repent of this tendency and resist it, whenever you realize you are wandering down this well-worn path.  Return to My Presence, which always awaits you in the present moment.  I accept you back with no condemnation.

I am fearful...which I shouldn't be.  God is very clear over this.  I need to lay this at His feet and rest assuredly that He goes before me and prepares the way.  

More isn't necessarily better...in every other subject we cover on a daily basis, and with school in general, I am very much of the mindset that they are children only once, not needing to get into Harvard tomorrow.  They will eventually learn everything they need to know, and it doesn't need to be by the end of their kindergarten year. I look back on what I was doing in these early grades and it is no where near the amount of work and pressure we are putting on this generation of school children.  I am confident of this in every other curriculum choice, yet the devil has been using Math to distract and confuse me.

I have currently been working on a new math program that I found and really do think is working well for the boys.  I have decided to be at peace with it, to not try and outwit, out think or confuse the matter. It's a mastery approach vs. the spiral approach we have been using thus far and it has been working out just fine.  I plan to stick with this, unless I feel prompted BY THE LORD to change, not from my own flesh or out of feelings of fear.

I feel such a release over this and actually quite silly.  I am so adamant on not putting much pressure on my boys in every other curriculum choice we make, yet why was I putting such high pressure on myself and them over math???   

It's very comforting knowing that God IS in control and if I can just keep myself from getting in the way...life would be a lot easier! :)